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MICHAEL NEILL'S COACHING TIP NUMBER 376November 17, 2003
Welcome to 60 new subscribers this week! Due to continuing problems with our broadcast system, this weeks tip is coming to all 7500+ of you in plain text. You can read the full color version online at www.successmadefun.com/tip.html. Remember, you may share these tips to your friends and you may reprint any tip in your newsletters and message boards providing you include full authorship, copyright, and subscription information. Only two weeks left to take advantage of the $300 early bird discount for the Holistic Coaching Made Fun retreat in La Paz, Mexico. For full information, please visit us at www.successmadefun.com! THE POWER OF COMMITMENT
One of my favorite cartoons on the power of commitment is a panel by Gary Larsen featuring an elephant in a trench-coat and fedora standing in a doorway. An elderly man looks up at him, startled. 'Remember me, Mr. Schneider?' the elephant asks. 'Kenya, 1947. If you're going to shoot at an elephant, Mr. Schneider, you'd better be prepared to finish the job.' So often in life, there is a tremendous discrepancy between what we say we want and what (if anything) we demonstrate our commitment to having. When these two things are aligned, the world is our oyster, and we experience life as a continual unfoldment of positive challenges and pleasant rewards. When they are out of sync, we experience struggle, helplessness, depression, and despair. Why is committing to what we really want to have in our life so important? Well, in the oft misattributed words of Scottish historian and adventurer W. H. Murray: “Until one is committed, there is hesitancy, the chance to draw back, always ineffectiveness. Concerning all acts of initiative (and creation) there is one elementary truth, the ignorance of which kills countless ideas and splendid plans: That the moment one definitely commits oneself, then Providence moves too. All sorts of things occur to help one that would never otherwise have occurred. A whole stream of events issues from the decision, raising in one’s favor all manner of unforeseen incidents and meetings and material assistance, which no man could have dreamed would have come his way. I have learned a deep respect for one of Goethe’s couplets:
Given the power of commitment to transform our lives, why do we find it so difficult to commit? Two reasons...
Here are a few simple strategies on how to overcome your fears and safely and successfully tap in to your power to commit to having what you want: Strategy Number One - Only Commit to What You Actually Want to Be, Do, Get, or Have
Commitment is a natural power we all share, but when we verbally commit to things you don't really want, we weaken our access to that power. As often as not, these reluctant commitments are really coercions - things we have allowed ourselves to be talked, seduced, or bullied into committing to by occasionally well-meaning friends, colleagues, parents, bosses, spouses, and motivational speakers. An authentic commitment is intrinsically generous - it is a gift you give yourself from the heart. The easiest way to tell the difference between a reluctant and authentic commitment is how it feels in your body. A reluctant commitment brings tension and strain; an authentic commitment brings with it a sense of ease, well-being, and energy Strategy Number Two - Commit for a Fixed Time
I have a client who is currently doing the Atkins diet in an attempt to shift thirty pounds or so of unwanted weight. As I listened to him begin to engage in the equivocation and negative self-talk that has dogged his many attempts to lose weight in the past, I made the simple suggestion that he commit fully to eating this way for six weeks. At that time, he could re-evaluate the diet and make a decision as to whether or not to continue. You could hear the weight lift from his shoulders immediately. (Though I think technically he wanted it to lift from his stomach and thighs... :-) While traditionalists would no doubt reject marriage vows which asked "just for today, will you have this woman as your lawful wedded wife?", there is an honesty to the the question that speaks not to a lack of commitment but the reality of how a purely verbal commitment works - that however ardently you say it today, you can always un-say it tomorrow. By committing to a set course of action for a fixed period of time, we increase the likelihood of not only talking the talk but walking the walk - and walking the walk is what ultimately leads to our having what we want. Strategy Number Three - Make the Ultimate Commitment
There is one commitment that makes all others unnecessary - the commitment to the still, small voice within. Whether you think of it as surrender to a higher power or simply allowing your conscience to be your guide, the commitment to follow your guidance moment by moment transcends the need to commit to specific behaviors or outcomes. I have found the following prayer from 'A Course in Miracles' to be extremely helpful in focusing me on choosing guidance over outcome on a daily basis:
If you're not yet a member of our 365 day Success Made Fun program and online community, please consider joining us at www.successmadefun.com. TODAY'S EXPERIMENT
Have fun, learn heaps, and enjoy the benefits of a committed life! Until next time, michael PS - The 7 Myths of Success is a 4 CD set sharing the best of what I've learned about breaking through limiting ideas of success, happiness, and well-being. Here's what MNCT reader Andie Hemming had to say: "I first subscribed to the MNCT in May 2000 and every Monday look forward very very much to receiving this week's tip! I have used them so much that I was thrilled to order 'The 7 Myths of Success' as soon as I was able to! I love your style - warm, humorous and self-deprecating - and find everything you suggest doing to be of such value that I have already recommended to my friends and colleagues that they also purchase a copy of the CD." To find out more, go to: www.successmadefun.com/estore/7myths.html To read more testimonials go to: www.successmadefun.com/estore/7mythstestimonials.html To order now, go to: https://www.mcssl.com/app/javanof.asp?merchantid=27384&productid=1394574
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